So I finished The Perks Of Being A Wallflower and I don't know how to feel or what to read next. I just want to read it all over again, it's such an important book. The main character may be just a teen, but he is so big. The plot is perfect, characters are perfect, writing is too. The book itself is perfect. It's not just a book. And, of course, it makes you feel infinite.
Great day indeed, plus this Forever21 shirt just came on the mail. It's just so flawless.
And again, I've forgotten about this blog. I can't comit to anything. Last month has been a mess, I've been a mess. Exams are coming and, with them, long nights and not sleep, that is lots of coffee. But, at least, I'm finally reading The Perks Of Being A Wallflower and I'm loving it way too much. I like the diary thing.
Photos: quote from this book which I've fallen in love with. And in that moment, I swear we were infinite.
My father just told me we're seeing 'Swan Lake' by the Imperial Russian Ballet Company on Saturday. I've seen them once, but it was before I watched the film'Black Swan'by Natalie Portman. I didn't understand the story the first time so, after watching that film, I was completely in love with it and wanted to see it performed by the Russian Ballet Company again, which is my favourite. I've seen some other ballets by them, such as 'The Nutcracker' or 'Cinderella' and they never fail to impress me. If you have a chance and like ballet, go see them. It won't dissapoint you.
Today I've realised I'm getting a bit too obsessed with "Sherlock" (BBC Series) and there won't be more episodes for a really, really long time. God help me, 'cause I'm already losing my patience. It's not like other series and they are both great actors and... and no, I can't wait. I need more!
I don't own the photo, I just liked it. Source: We Heart It.
Well, I guess patience is not my virtue. "Carpe Diem" is not, as well. I woke up today longing for last Christmas holidays, I'm one of those people who don't like living in the present, who want to go back to the past, safer times. I had such a great time in Mérida (Spain) last Christmas and now routine has taken over my life again. I'm feeling a bit lost these days. As I just said, I want to go back to safer times: Past.
Some pics from that trip:
That's all today is been for: trying. Doing the unexpected, what I never thought of doing. I've been on stage, the magician chose me and I had to go in front of the crowd, and that's something I never really thought of doing. But it felt so great... I realised that I'm not that shy girl anymore, that I exist. I even had to kiss him. I don't know how to explain it, but it just felt good. Not the kiss haha, but the going on stage, that feeling of control, the whole play was awesome and he was really, really funny. Alson, my grandma gave me my grandfather's watch today. I didn't get to meet him, but I miss him terribly :') Another great feeling. So, yes, today it's been a day of good feelings. Something I've needed for a very long time.
There are times when you are so scared that you wouldn't follow your dreams anymore, afraid of rejection. There are times when I don't want to move from my house, my city, everything that have seen me grow. What if I want to give up on my dreams, on my writing, on the career I've always dreamt of, on university? Of course I don't want to, but there're times that I doubt it. What if? Those words scare me to death. What if I can't go to university? What if I have to stick around this country? What if, what if, what if? Fuck it. I'm going to inspire people, I'm going to inspire myself. I'm gonna be everything I promised I'll be: Huge.
PD: Excuse my English :)
PD2: I'll uploud the poem and the story (in Spanish, sorry) for the competition when I finish them. Someone asked me to (huge thanks) :)
Yesteday, I bought the "Wreck This Journal: To Create Is to Destroy" notebook by Keri Smith from Barnes &Noble, but I have to wait a bit for it to come. I should stop buying notebooks and scrapbooks, because I'm gonna ruin. But, well, things like that inspire me and I want to be a writer so, I like to think they are necessary. Plus, I'm going to take part in a writing competition and I need a lot of inspiration. I have to write a story 4-5 pages long about whatever I want or a poem and I think I'm gonna write both. I'm almost finished with the poem and I only have one page of the story. I would upload them here but, as I am Spanish, they're written in it. The deadline is april 23rd, so I'm sure I'll have time despite the exams and so. And that's what I should be doing right now... Studying :)
Here some pics I found of the journal I've just bought:
These are done by other people (all credit to them) but that's what this notebook is about.
So today is a really sad day, but I'm working on that-I'm gonna start living one day at a time. Not worrying about the timing, not regreting what I could've done. It's gonna be difficult but, if I achieve it, it's gonna be so great... The feeling that I've made it. I don't expect it to happen, though. But, at least, I'm gonna give it a try. It's not really the last day of Christmas, but the last day in Madrid (so for me, it's the same). Gotta prepare for the theatre!